Living With A Chronic Illness

Living Through the Depression

2009-09-13T06:28:00.003-04:00

We have all suffered with depression at some time in our life. For me it was this spring. I wanted to go to our bi-yearly family reunion. It was not to be. Low blood count and chronic fatigue was the diagnosis.

I was placed on high dosages of iron and multiple vitamins. "Four weeks and you will be your old self." said my doctor. He was so pleased with himself that I became excited too. I would follow his instructions to the letter.

Funny, my four weeks turned into eight. all the way up to the first day of the reunion I was sure I would wake up well and ready to go. I, however, was in no condition to travel. So, I spent that week and the next continuing to build my energy.

This weekend I received the following DVD from an extremely talented duo, "The King and I". I remember when they recorded this song. At that time they were both going through some very blue times. But working together they lived through their state of depression and this week produced this beautiful video.

"Savin Me" reminds us all that the first step in being saved starts from within.

Their web site www.kingandi.info is loaded with colorful language. So if you feel you maybe offended by strong language, PLEASE DO NOT visit their site. I do hope you enjoy Savin Me!

SAVIN ME

This song can be purchased at www.kingandi.biz

My Not So Private Life Desires

2009-04-22T01:25:00.008-04:00

This is my open letter to my future. I have taken the time to put into this video how I want my future to progress.

More years than I sometimes like to count, I learned the advantage of writing down what I wanted in my life. To my surprise, I did not always like what I thought I "just had to have." But, there it would be. My must have request bright and shiny starring me right in the face.

Practice taught me the importance of being specific. So when I was introduced to vision boards, I was ecstatic. It was my short cut to my future desires. I walked past that board with my photographs, newspaper clippings and magazine articles neatly glued to my board. I touched it, starred at it and talked to it daily.

By far, my favorite way of being clear about what I want has been with movie making. I love creating movies. It is one of my favorite hobbies. I would love to say that it is the easiest. But that it not the truth. It is the one that gives me the best joy. I enjoy turning a word just so. Or changing the color to fit seamlessly into the next frame. I enjoy the creative process. And adore the final results.

A lot of the depression we suffer with derives from the feeling of uselessness. Creating videos gives me that feeling of usefulness. And, yes, I find that all the process of focusing on what you want and making that clear request works. My two favorite things are;
1. Ask for what I want. Go big or go home. Ask.
2. Then believe I will receive it. That is our job. Having faith.

The how is not and never has been my job. So I wait. If an action is required of me, I will be given inspired thought concerning that action. Then, and only then, I act.

Here is my latest video. It is my no longer private life desires!

Previous EFT Articles

2009-04-21T03:05:00.002-04:00

Changing the Way You Think About Your Illness and Your

Tapping Your Way To Good Health

Emotion Free Technique (EFT) World Summit Starts This Week

2009-04-21T02:45:00.001-04:00

The World Summit of EFT started Monday, April 20, 2009 with a bang.

Promoters were expecting about 20,000 practitioners. Apparently 40,000 tuned in and it was hours before some of us were able to access the seminar. But that is OK because it is available 24 hours a day for the next nine days.

The programs were absolutely wonderful. I don't want to ruin it for you so I am providing the link so that you can register and be ready for the rest of the week.

http://www.eftworldsummit.com/

Affirmations To Instill Positive Values In Your Life

2009-03-29T18:00:00.008-04:00

While recovering from a gum infection and then oral surgery, spring marched right into every-one's life without me. But I was not absent from you hearts and your prayers. Your emails and phone calls witness to that fact. And I am so grateful!

I could not wait to get out into the yard to take pictures of the first blooms. I wanted to share the beauty I saw from my windows. But, until today, all I could do was recover and watch from afar. I was in what we who are chronically ill refer to as the dreaded "down time."

Down time is when we are suffering with an illness and our chronic fatigue kicks in. It is almost impossible to do anything other than what is required to live. You know like breathing, eating, going to the bath room. As much as you might want to visit us, and sometimes we want to see you more than you want to visit, it is not a time for company. It is a time for rest and rejuvenation.

Down time can be hard on friends and family. It is impossible for anyone who is not suffering with a chronic illness to understand how important it is to use down time wisely. It means that the person suffering will miss family functions and may have to miss scheduled social affairs. It means that you will not be able to socialize on the phone or the computer. It is self induced isolation. It may be the difference between a short recovery period and not recovering at all.

Those of us who have been ill for a number of years all ready know that during down time, we are really unable to form a thought worthy of conversation. We should be quite and we need to be still. We realize that a lot of feeling are hurt during down time. What the outside love one witness is raw unbound nerves. The words come out cold and uncaring. They are words that are better left unsaid. So when your chronically ill friend or love one says that they will have to bow out of an engagement, count it as a blessing. Then go and enjoy your event.

When they are up again, they will contact you. We always do. We love you!

OK, enough of catching up. Lingering too long on some-one's illness can certainly bring illness to you. One blog that teaches the "Law of Attraction" in every day terms and situations is Carol King at "Law of Attraction Help and "Missing Ingredient Coaching."

Coach Carol's "Missing Ingredient Coaching" site offer individual in depth personalized programs to succeed in attracting your life desires to you. And that includes good health. I have promised to be a better student. The insightful knowledge that Coach Carole offer is priceless.

I am so excited about this "Values Video." As I recovered form my surgery, I formed it in my mind. I could not wait to share the finished product with you. Spring is the perfect time to reinforce your positive values. What better tools than springs blossoms to help demonstrate them.

A special THANK YOU to Carl T at Healing Music Emporium for composing and offering the free mp3 of "In the Sunset." I am sure you will agree that the music is perfect for this video.

Carl offers free music with each post. So, please visit Healing Music Emporium and thank him for this wonderful music.

PLEASE TURN OFF THE MUSIC AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE BEFORE STARTING THE VIDEO!

For Everything There Is a Season

2009-03-01T15:45:00.005-05:00

Last summer in 98 degree temperatures this yellow Canna flourished.

This morning in 37 degree temperatures, this Forsythia flourished.

Nature does remind us that for everything there is a season. Today's Affirmation; I am grateful for every experience in my life.

The God Experience

2009-02-26T13:00:00.000-05:00

There is a difference between worshiping God and experiencing God. This day, I experienced God. I surrended to the obvious, that there is something more powerful than me. Namaste my friend.

Six Things That Make Me Smile

2009-02-18T06:00:00.003-05:00

I was recently tagged by my dear blogger friend, Jeanne at Jeanne's Endo Blog to list six things that make me smile. First, I like Jeanne who works tirelessly creating endometriosis awareness. There is so much miss information floating around the web concerning endometriosis and for that reason, Jeanne's blog backs up her information with the latest medical findings. Jeanne's dedication makes me smile.

Jeanne recently produced her first vlog (video blog) and it is excellent. She is a soft spoken young lady but her words are powerful and informative. Jeanne is determined to get legitimate information published in mainstream media magazines.

One of the people who can make that happen is Mariela Azcuy. Ms Azcuy is Senior Associate Director for Ladies Home Journal, More, and Siempre Mujer magazines. You can help make Jeanne's efforts successful by contacting Ms Azcuy. Her contact information is listed below.

Mariela Azcuy
Senior Associate Director of PR
Ladies' Home Journal More and Siempre Mujer Magazines
Meredith Corp.
125 Park Ave, 17th Floor
NYC 10017
mariela.azcuy@meredith.com

go ahead, MAKE ME SMILE!!!
Family gathering always make me smile. The photo below is of my step mom, my father, two of my younger sisters and my only son, who is my care giver. These smiling faces put depression on the run.

Blogging makes me smile. During a recent bout with chronic fatigue, it became too tiring, to go across the hall to my office. So, I adjust, and move the bones of my office to my bedroom. I am so happy with my new area. And, yes, I smiled.

I love looking out my kitchen window and seeing the waterfalls that lead to my pond. It makes me smile because my son built it for me. He created a natural beauty on the side of the hill and it looks as if it has always been there. I like watching the water flow in the summer... as well as the winter months. Yes, it makes me smile. And brings comfort to my chronic pain. It is my alternative medicine for many illnesses.

Mornings make me smile. Now that is an affirmation that I can say with enthusiasm. Some mornings are so magnificient that I just stand and gaze in amazement. This was one such morning. Just before the sun topped the ridge, it lit up the sky as if the world was on fire. I was fortunate enough to capture this beautiful shot.

I like feed back form my blogging friends. This is a picture I received from Pamela at Pam's Garden Space. Pam sent me this photo of her quite space. It was in response to an article I had post regarding the importance of creating Peaceful Spaces At Home. Positive interacting with others makes me smile.

How BEAUTIFUL Pamela.

Now for a list of other bloggers who make me smile;
Renee @ My Autumn Years
Shauna @ Life In Pain and Other Fun Things
Carole @ Missing Ingredient Coaching
Ambri @ Ambri's Indego
Shauna @ Trying To Stay Calm
Sheri @ Angellviews
Mark @ Healing Music Emporium
Chick @ Migraine Chick
Please visit their sites and make them smile by leaving a comment on their latest blog.

Love Affirmations For the Chronically Ill

2009-01-17T17:12:00.013-05:00

One of the hardest things for the chronically ill to do is to love one's self. We tend to concentrate on our arthritis pain or out fluctuating glucose levels. But, waking each day and saying positive affirmations, may improve your mental attitude about your physical health. A positive mental attitude will keep depression at bay.

Here are a few to start your day. When you think of others, write them down and began saying those through out your day as well. By the end of the year, you will be pleasantly surprised at the changes in you. Of Course, your changes will be noticeable long before that.

You are worth five minutes a day. Fill your world with positive thoughts. Thoughts become things!

BEFORE STARTING THE VIDEO, PLEASE TURN OFF THE MUSIC AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE.

Even the Chronically Ill Can Reach A New Level of Healthy. With Gratitude, There Is Hope.

2009-01-03T05:00:00.007-05:00

I resolve to loose weight, I resolve to be rich. I resolve to have peace. I resolve to...fill in the blank. All of us have pulled out our journals at one time or another and jotted down at least one of these New Year's Resolutions. However, most fall by the way side before the end of January. And with good reason. You are acting outside of a natural law. It is the Law of Gratitude.

Wes Hopper offers a free E-book explaining "The Astonishing Power of Gratitude. In it, Wes gives five examples of why people don't succeed in accomplishing their goals. It is short, easy to read, and the information is priceless.

On a recent luncheon at a local "All You Can Eat" restaurant, my attention was drawn to the overweight patrons in the restaurant. It is not the food that is causing the weight gain. It is the quantity of food they are piling on their plates and eating. They are showing a lack of gratitude for the correct amount. To prove their ungratefulness, they eat right past it-right into obesity and in some cases, right into diabetes.

Diana Young who writes "Ask the Dietitian'" post an article entitled, "Five Ways I Plan To Keep My New Year's Resolution." It is packed with good ideas and healthy eating practices. Dian even post a short video clip to get us thinking positive in 2009. Check out her post and find out what a locavore is. You may be one and don't know it!

Not a day goes by that I don't hear someone say or read that someone can help make another a millionaire if only they would buy this program or read that book. The bottom line is, the only person that can propel you to the millionaire status is you. And it starts by being grateful for the money you have today. We show gratitude for our money when we save as well as when we share. I believe both to be equally as important.

Robin, who writes "The Spirit Knows Best," recently post an article entitled "Healing A Broken Heart: A Second Chance." In it, Robin describes what is really important in this life. When a chronic illness becomes critical, you figure it out and you know who to give thanks to. Robin's article is heart wrenching. And Yet, She gives you hope. Because Robin figures it out. Reading it may help you to figure out what is missing in your life.

So, this year as you write your New Year's Resolutions, remember to give thanks for all the blessings you already have. By showing gratitude for what you already have, you open up your life to receive a continuous flow of blessings.

Don't know who to give gratitude to? Wallace Wattles, in "The Science of Getting Rich" uses these terms interchangeably;

"Energy, Power, Infinite, Creative Power, Supreme Intelligence, Think Stuff, Original Substance, Formless Intelligence, Source, Universe, Intelligent Substance, Nature, One Living Substance, Father, and, of course, God.

Joy in the Morning

2008-12-18T00:00:00.002-05:00

After suffering for two weeks with a cold that was so bad I began to think it was the flu, I awoke Sunday morning well. I sat in bed waiting on the aches, sneezing and coughing. They never came. It was nothing short of a miracle to me. I had not been able to set up for any length of time. I could not bear to hear my phone ring or any other noise for that matter. Except for checking in with my family to let them know I was OK, my phone was off. I was imposing self-induced isolation. That is the way I cope with illness.

But, on Sunday morning, it was all over. I sat there mediating and giving thanks for my healing. I then went to my favorite spot (the window of the bathroom adjacent to my bedroom), looked out at the new day and was once again the recipient of a breath taking sunrise. The results are the above photos.

Who would not want to witness such beauty? I truly felt the joy of that new morning.

Later, while viewing the results of my mini photo shoot, I was reminded of the many people we encounter in a life time. The airplane vapors streaking across the morning sky reminded me of people who come into our lives. Our paths crossing just that quickly.

Eventually, only we remain with our individual fleeting memories of the encounter. I prayed that the people I had met would remember me fondly. I prayed that once they left my life, for what ever reason, they thought their lives were richer for the experience.

I am grateful for those experiences and I am thankful for the people who helped to create them.

The rest of the day was spent making phone calls to family and friends thanking them for their positive energy. It was a good day. and for that I am so grateful!

Bringing in the Holidays with the Flower of Friendship Award

2008-12-17T05:00:00.004-05:00

With the Christmas holiday upon us, it is easy for the chronically ill to feel lonely and depressed.

Doctors are so aware of the problem of depression and suicide this time of year that they make a point of asking if your family situation has changed and how are you going to spend your holiday.

During this season, people who are debilitated start to reflect on their loss of good health, loss of job, loss of friends, loss of home, lack of food, etc. Their losses can take center stage at this time. And, in some cases send them to a place of no return.

That is why this award was so welcomed when I received it from Carole King at Inspired Journey. It let me know that someone thought of me. Carole took time out of her day to remind me that I have a friend who cares. Carole is indeed a good friend and it is nice to know that she feels the same way.

So, now it is time for me to reconize a few of my other friends. If your name appears below,
(A) download the badge
(B) upload it to your site
(C) link back to this blog
(D) spread the love to at least seven other bloggers

And my friends are;
1. Mixed up Optimistic Pessimist
2. Psyche Analyzed
3. Heart Failure Solutions
4. The Spirit Knows Best
5. Chronic Chick Talk
6. Seeking Inner Peace
7. The Golden Flow of the Law of Attraction

Be well my friends!!!

SkyWatch Friday and Powerful Moments

2008-11-28T03:30:00.002-05:00

On this very beautiful autumn morning in October, I remember standing on the top patio of my yard that over looks my house and feeling so grateful. Grateful for the opportunity to witness this brand new day. Gratitude continued to flood my entire being. Without thinking, my voice softly spoke;"Thank You."

I walked a few steps and took the above picture through a clump of trees. It closely resembles a heart. A heart saying; "Because I love you, you are always welcome." When I walk in my garden, that is what I feel, loved.

I sat there for a few minutes watching my universe continue to change. The deep blue sky with its orange and white clouds was transformed into the above photo.

Although the sun was burning its way into the morning sky, the area surrounding me felt soft, quiet. calm-and yet powerful.

In complete aw, I once again heard my voice say; "Thank you!"

Thank you for this day-this powerful moment .

Thank you for the good that is in my health and my heart.

Thank you for what I can do.

What Is Your Dream And Are You Following It?

2008-11-23T14:00:00.007-05:00

This Pickerel Weed Plant (Pontederia) gave me many hours of joy this summer.Its beautiful green leaves float just above the pond's water. However when the blooms appear, they shoot about a foot into the air. It is truly a sight to see.

Recently, Roschell at Sagacious Rambling published an article on her blog that remind me why I research my post so extensive. I want the information I give to others to be entertaining, informative, and, to the best of my knowledge, correct. That is my dream. I hope you have your own dream-your own passion.

Like this Pickerel Weed bloom, our body may float just above the water. But, when we create, when we follow out dream, our minds shot a foot into the air. And the result is something beautiful and sometimes great.

Please feel free to post your dream along with your comment. If you cannot think of one, today might be a good day to slow down and focus on you.

"Follow your dreams don't let anything stop you."
Brenden Foster 1997-2008

Is Laughter the Best Medecine?

2008-11-23T11:00:00.002-05:00

MUSIC MONDAY

Madan Katarie, a family physician from Mumbai, India, is the person who is credited with starting the first laughter yoga club in 1995. He has been the driving force behind over 5,000 Laughter clubs in 40 countries. Katarie says that it does not matter if you really have something to laugh about or not. At first, he pretends to laugh. Then his laughing becomes funny to him and he is laughing for real.

Laughter Yoga is said to be good for you because it exercises both the body and the mind. The mind is exercised through the meditation techniques preformed before the laughter is begun. Those who have participated in his laugh classes say that it leaves them with a sense of warmth, hope and joy.

Scientist at the University of California have proven that laughter, while exercising your cardiovascular, also, lowers key stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenalin. In addition, laughter boast the body's natural killer cells that go after tumor cell and virally infected cells.

You don't have to wait until World Laughter day, which takes place on the first Sunday in May. If it is indeed true that laughter is the best medicine, then you can mail your checks to me immediately. This is one of the funniest music videos I have ever seen. Any time I need a pick me up, I play this video. It is funny every time.

The performance is excellent every time!

PLEASE TURN OFF THE MUSIC AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE BEFORE STARTING THE VIDEO!

Forgive, Release And Validation Are Words That Can Change Your Relationship With The Chronically Ill

2008-11-20T06:00:00.025-05:00

Fall colors stand out against the evening sky. On this autumn evening in October, I snapped a shot of a tree holding on to the last rays of the setting sun.

Holding on to painful memories and the belief that someone we love did something to us that was unfair, that suffering with a chronic illness is unfair or that your financial situation is unfair serves no useful purpose.

It is time to let go of those thoughts that stimulate negative feelings and decide to reach for the light that points toward positive direction. Before the sun sets today. Forgive someone. And, don't forget to forgive yourself.

Is it 'Nesse', the Loch Ness Monster? It certainly gives the illusion of Ole Nesse. But it is a tree stretching its imaginary neck into the evening sky.

As the sun sets for the evening, it shines on the fall leaves illuminating their colors in the trees.

The green leaves representing summer and the slight colorful ones representing summer's ability to release its ownership of the land and hand it over to autumn.

What do you need to release or let go of to feel peace within?

This picture of the sun rising is beautiful and yet, complex. While I marveled at the beauty of the morning sky, I knew that these blue, orange, golden yellow, wisp of white and black clouds meant a dramatic change in the weather was on its way.

It is a lot like a vast number of people suffering with a chronic illness. Looks are deceiving. The inside can be in constant pain and the mind in disarray, while looking good on the outside.This has to be the number one complaint of people who suffer with a chronic illness; "My family dismiss my claims of fatigue, pain and depression because they believe I look too good to be sick.".

You cannot fix their problems and they are aware of that. However, you hold the answer to the end of a lot of stress and depression. Validity. Validating that you know they may not feel well today, is a major key to easing a lot of tension in your relationship with the chronically ill. "Go ahead, make their day." A dramatic change could be on the way!

Inflammatory Breast Cancer, The Silent Killer

2008-11-18T10:11:00.010-05:00

For the first time since starting this blog, I am blogging about an illness that I don't have, Inflammatory Breast Cancer. Because so few women have heard of it and so few doctors have actually seen a case of it, it is called the silent killer.

When I opened my email this morning, I found that a friend had sent this information to me. An illness with the potential to take my life and I have never heard of Inflammatory Breast Cancer. As I watched the video, I was shocked. A sense of urgency filled every fiber of my body. I immediately stopped reading emails and began creating this blog.

We are diligently working with the Breast Cancer site to help fund mammograms for women who cannot afford them. But that is not enough. We also have to inform women that getting a mammogram is only part of your staying healthy process. So that you will know your body, you must perform self breast exams and discern when something about your breast just does not look right.

After viewing the above video, please don't forget to click the PINK button to the right of the blog. You are not asked to pay for anything. You just click the PINK button through to the Breast Cancer site and their advertisers will do the rest.

BEFORE VIEWING THE VIDEO, PLEASE TURN DOWN OR TURN OFF THE MUSIC AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS BLOG.

When Love Comes To The Rescue

2008-11-17T05:20:00.000-05:00

What ever love is missing in your life; love of self, love of family, love of a significant other or love of your higher power, when it arrives, Your joy is visible to both you and those who come into your presence.

When that love is a deep inner love it is good. it often times relieves the tension in your life and, as a result, may even help relieve your pain. It is as if love has come to your rescue.

This MUSIC MONDAY I present to you Oleta Adams singing When Love Comes To the Rescue.

For more great music visit Speedcat Hollydale's site for Music Mondays!

Living

2008-11-15T15:00:00.004-05:00

AWARD for participation

dedication and affection to
TODAY'S FLOWERS

It is hard not to smile when you look out your window and see this pink verbena being visited by a beautiful Swallowtail butterfly.

The white flowers are mums that returned from previous years. The verbena are teturns aswell.

On this bright summer day it is not hard to be grateful for just being alive. And, deeply and profoundly accepting yourself-just the way you are.

Many of us spend our whole lives running from feeling. With the mistaken belief that we cannot bear the pain. But we have already borne the pain. What you have not done is feel all you are beyond the pain. Kahlil Gibran

Together, the blogging community is feeding the hungry and funding mammograms. FREE! No money required. We CLICK through to the Breast Cancer site and the Hungry site. That is it. Just click the BLUE and PINK buttons to the right of this blog post. You have done your part. Thank you for caring!

"Living With A Chronic Illness" Receives the CHARMED Award

2008-11-15T05:00:00.003-05:00

Sheri at Angellviews, surprised "Living With A Chronic Illness with the CHARMED award. There are some rules to accepting this award. This one comes with a note: "These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in prizes or self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers" Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must chose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award."

So, in the spirit of this award, I am passing it on to eight more bloggers. They were all chosen for their individually charming blog. So Here they are. In no particular order;

1. Heart Failure Solutions

4. Binbrian

7. Nuture Our Child With Love and Patience

8. Pam's Garden Space

We are clicking to help fund mammograms and to feed the hungry. No money is required from you. You just click the pink and/or blue buttons to the right of this blog. That is it. The advertisers to the Brest Cancer and Hungry sites will do the rest. THANK YOU FOR CARING!

The Science of Possibilities

2008-11-13T06:00:00.001-05:00

When I awake and complete my morning meditation, the first thing I do is go to my bathroom window to see what miracles the new day has brought. For every new sunrise is a miracle. On this particular morning, those gold and orange tone clouds in the sky told me that some much needed rain was on the way.

Why is my bathroom window of such intense interest? It is the window that I take most all of my morning pictures from. I want to know if my camera is needed.

As you can see, it was a beautiful sunrise and I was happy to be able to tale this shot in my pajamas.

As the day went on, the sun played peek-a-boo with the clouds. And before the next morning, most of these beautiful colors would be on the ground. This day was a good example of change happening. As we know, change will happen. We can participate or we can just let it happen to us. That is why I like quantum physics. It is the science of possibilities. For life to mean anything to you, you must chose one of your desired possibilities. Or, life will chose for you.

There are two desired possibilities that I have chosen to work on. One is the possibility of free mammograms for woman who cannot afford to pay for their own and the other is to provide food for the hungry. These are two campaigns that all of us can afford to do. There is absoutly no money required from you. All it takes is a CLICK A DAY from each of us on the pink and blue buttons to the right of this blog. WE ARE NOT REQUIRED TO DO ANYTHING ELSE. The advertiser for the Brest Cancer site and the Hunger Site will do the rest.

Just think of the possibilities!

Visit SkyWatch Friday for more beautiful pictures.

"Lemonade" Is Awarded to "Living With A Chronic Illness"

2008-11-10T13:27:00.019-05:00

We are honored beyond measure to have received the "Lemonade " award from The Chronic Chick Talk Blog. This award is given to blogs demonstrating a great attitude of gratitude. How nice is that?

In accepting this award, I must pay it forward by bestowing the honor on at least ten other blogs that I feel are living up to an attitude of gratitude. It was an easy decision for me.

And the award goes to;

1. Jeanne's Endo Blog

2. Pam's Gardening Space

3. Shuna's Life In Pain And Other Fun Things

4. Speedcat Hollydale Page

5. Inspired Journey

6. Seeking Inner Peace

7. Sagacious Rambling

8. As The Mind Wanders

9. The Oxygen Chronicles

10. When Least Expected

11. Love Ely

Today's Flowers #14 What Do They Have To Do With Your Chronic Illness?

2008-11-09T20:00:00.000-05:00

Visit Today's Flowers Community and view nature at its best, while opening up a whole new world of friends. There are two hobbies that the chronically ill seem to venture toward. They are photography and flower gardning. This community combines both. So you are very likely to find people, with whom, you have something in common.

This is our first offering to the Today's Flowers community. I love this beautiful plant because it was given to me by an elderly neighbor. It is the bloom of a Hosta plant. I have an ever increasing variety of the texture-rich leafy green Hosta plants. But, I had never seen one with blooms this big. When I saw her's, I just had to have one.

It was the middle of summer when I saw her beautiful Hosta garden. It was full and lush. Too pretty and too late in the season to be disturbed. So, she promised, if I came over in early spring of the next year, she would give me one. Well, it was worth the wait. She gave me several rhizomes. If you know Hostas, you know that simply cutting the rhizomes into smaller pices and planting thoes rhizomes in the spring, gives you a whole new flower bed. That is just what happened. As you can see, theye were beautiful.

Sometimes when we see seemingly health people going on with their lives, we want what they have-a healthy body and a productive life. Like my neighbors healthy and productive Hosta bed. However, it is not our time, yet. We must first rejuvinate our mind and then our body will follow.

If we are willing to eat the proper foods, go to rehabilitation therpy, take our medication correctly, perform meditation techniques and/or pray, etc... In short, delegently do what you know will help you to get to a fuller life. Instead of wanting and waiting, you will have YOUR own healthy and productive life.

Like I made up my mind that I wanted one of those beautiful Hosta plants, you must make up your mind what you want concerning your health.

Autumn Gratitude

2008-11-08T12:42:00.017-05:00

There are many ways to help stave off depression and to feel grateful for our lives. This video demonstrates one of them. It gives you short sentences to up lift and encourage you to appreciate and be grateful for just being YOU.

Sometimes we are so sick that we cannot remember to say anything good about ourselves or to anyone else. That attitude serves to keep us in that dark hole of depression longer.

View the video and then think of the beauty that is in your life. The beauty you are grateful for. It might be the bright smile of a child. It might be the tender touch of your significant other. It might be the quite time you spend alone with your Devine Creator-your Source-your God.

Reach deep within and find that place of peace. Remember who you are. Allow the smile that has been waiting to appear on your face to shine through. Let yourself enjoy today. It is the only time we really have. Why not make it the best day of your life.

Autumn Moon Rises For Our First SkyWatch Friday

2008-11-06T22:04:00.008-05:00

Constantly searching for ways to help our readers feel as positive about themselves and their lives as possible, we have joined SkyWatch Friday.

SkyWatch is a place to enjoy the results of photographers from all over the globe, who point their cameras toward the skies to bring you amazing, sometimes thought provoking, beautiful pictures for your enjoyment.

Our first offering is a picture shot in the back yard of the Autumn moon just as it has moved to the right side of the house.

The leaves hanging into view, let you know that fall is here.

Have an amazing Friday!!!

Autumn's Sunrises and Sunsets To Cheer The Chronically Ill

2008-11-04T06:30:00.000-05:00

Saturday and/or Sunday car rides with my family were always a special treat. With my family living all over the country, those rides together are no longer possible. However, whenever I think of them, their memories still formulate a smile on my face as well as in my heart.

Certainly we know that we do not have to leave home to find and build new memories. Nature demonstrates that moment to moment. And, has allowed me to view its beauty through my bedroom window. Or, sitting just outside my front door with the sun beaming on my face. Some pictures were taken from my favorite rocker that sits on my screened in deck. And still others were snapped as I casually walked through the ever changing flower garden.

Of course, sharing the beauty that I see is half the fun. There fore, I hope you enjoy the above video. So sit back listen to the traveling music and imagine that you are in your automobile on a Sunday drive in the fall of the year. The best part is, you are allowed to sit in the comfort of you home to observe Nature changing her wardrobe into Autumn.

Changing The Way You Think About Your Illness And Your Life

2008-10-27T03:00:00.008-04:00

If you have been chronically ill for an extended period, it may be time to examine your thoughts about your illness and your life in general.

As if with some predetermined purpose, several years ago, a tree began to grow in my yard. Living in a wooded area, a new tree was not a novelty. I did not particularly like where it was growing. However, I had stopped performing my own yard work and had a lot more pressing issues than a new tree in my yard.

Still, the tree had one quality that I just loath. Each fall, it produced these large green balls. They seemed to have no useful qualities. The dogs would not even play with them. By inadvertently stepping on one, I had lost my footing. In addition, on more than one occasion, I had been conked on the head by one of these unwanted visitors as it made it's descend to earth.

I had literally cursed the tree and had marked it for future firewood. I had grown to hate the tree.

One bright autumn Saturday morning, a friend called to invite me to lunch. We had not seen each other in a while and I quickly took her up on her offer. Like many who take multiple medications, no longer having the luxury of driving available, we are at the mercy of those who do. She told me the time she would pick me up and I was ready and waiting.

We have been friends since childhood. Therefore, lunch together is a talkfest. It was wonderful. We immediately turn into nine year olds again. We sat in the restaurant completely oblivious to others around us while still soaking in the accommodating ambiance of the restaurant.

When we returned to my home, I invited her to visit the recent changes in the garden. Each season is a change in the garden for with nature that is the rule, nothing stays the same. As we walked, I described what each tree, bush, and plant did. We collaborated on the best way to grow the ones we had in common.

As we headed back toward the house, she asked me about the dreaded tree. "I don't know what that is." I declared. It just started growing. I have grown to hate it. It drops those green balls on the ground. I grudgingly stated; "The dogs won't even play with them." She bent down, picked one up, and said; "If this is what I think it is," then she abruptly stopped.

"What do you think it is?" I asked.

"I'll show you in a minute." She said.

We walked to a concrete block. She laid it on the concrete block and asked for something to smash it. I quickly obliged by handing her a brick. With one crunch, she stood up and started to smile.

What is it? I asked again. This time a little more impatiently.

Here! I could smell it before I saw it. "It's a walnut!" I said, answering my own question. "Yes!" She replied. Walnuts! We both started to laugh. All those years I had a FREE walnut tree in my yard and did not know it.

Of course, I had help in the cover up. The squirrels did know the value and they were busy taking care of their interest.

As with our health, I had not investigated deeply enough to learn the value of the tree. Often when introduced to techniques or procedures previously unknown or foreign to us, without even investigating the possibilities of the veiled results, we tune out or shout down.

If our doctor or therapist did not suggest it, we are afraid to try it. We are even afraid to discuss it with our medical professionals. The fear of hearing we are wrong or that is just "mom bow jumbo", keeps some of us needlessly tied to our illness. Could it be that we remain chronically ill, to some degree, as much a part of fear of the unknown as the illness its' self?

The easier or less expensive the technique, the harder to believe it could possible work. We would rather curse the technique or procedure than give it an opportunity to work.

The walnut tree was free. Not one day did it require me to water, mulch or fertilize it for it to grow into the fruit-bearing tree it is today. And, subsequently, it is the same with some illness we experience with our body. We could very possibly stop the pain or end the illness, if we would just delve a little deeper into what is really causing the malady.

An injury we understand. We know that, with time, a simple injury will heal on its own-just as the tree grew on its own. However, what about a disease, can it be that easy? Can it be the body's dis-ease? Once we understand it, by mentally putting the body at ease, cure the illness?

Emotion Free Technique (EFT) suggested that it is. Following a post earlier this month, several people agreed that it is just that simple. To give it a chance to work in our own chronic pain-filled lives, would mean that we would have to change the way we think about ourselves as we relate to the rest of the world. We might even have to admit our own preconceived believes and uneducated decisions determine our poor health.

As with the walnut tree, I made decisions concerning the tree based on my limited knowledge of the tree. I had never taken the time to explore a little deeper into what the green balls were. All I knew was come spring they were gone.

I personally like Emotion Free Technique (EFT). However,
EFT is not the only technique that can help stop our pain and/or cure an illness that medicine alone cannot reach. Others diverse treatments include Integrated Medicine (ATTITUDE), Reiki Life, Natural Health, Super Brain Therapy, etc.

You have to know that the squirrels were benefiting from my ignorance about my walnut tree. Who is benefiting from your ignorance about your illness?

Tapping Your Way To Good Health

2008-10-13T07:39:00.003-04:00

Because I have suffered with chronic pain for over thirty years, a relative recently sent me an email containing a link to Emotional Freedom Techniques. Or, better known as the Tapping Technique. It is described as an updated version of acupuncture, without the needles.

The website contains a FREE 87 page training manual. Which I am still reading. Both the site and the manual suggest that you complete it before you delve into the techniques. I, also, strongly encourage you to do the same.

As someone who has lived with multiple chronic illnesses, my goal is to share information that could positively affect your health too. If it helps you, I would certainly like to know. So I am placing a poll to the right of this article. There is no personnel information gathered or shared with anyone else. The poll is strictly for this site's information.

I am in no way connected with the organization or the people who own emofree.com. I do think that if there is a technique that will help with or cure your chronic illness, it is worth looking into. So, we are looking into it.

Introduction to EFT

What is EFT?

How To Use The Pressure Points

Stop Needing A Doctor

After viewing the above videos, completing the training manual and trying the technique, PLEASE return to this blog and take the EFT poll!!!

What is Pranic Healing and Can It Stop Your Chronic Pain?

2008-10-03T09:00:00.007-04:00

After reading my previous post on the devastation chronic pain has on one's life, several weeks ago, Valerie at CureDepression With Umbrellas (Don't you just love the title of her blog site?), sent me an email concerning the possibility of Pranic Healing helping with my chronic pain.

As someone who lives almost constantly in chronic pain, I have to admit that I am open minded when it comes to stopping pain. I will read until I can no longer see straight, try it and tell the world whether it worked for me or not. So that is exactly what I did with Valerie's suggestion.

After searching several sites, this is the one that helped me the most. It is titled The Ancient Science and Art of Panic Healing. It contained three CBS news reports on the subject.

CBS PRANIC HEALING VIDEOS

Healing Hands

Teaching People to Heal Themselves

The Art to Heal the Body

I can tell you that with the combination of my pain medications and Pranic Healing, my back pain is better. It is better than it has been in months. That is what integrated medicine is about. It is a combination of Eastern and Western medication with faith to achieve the ultimate healing process.

For the new practitioners, I would love to hear your experiences. For those of you who practice Pranic Healing on yourself and/or others, any additional instructions are certainly welcome!

The HealthCentral Network Approves Video For Pain Awareness Month!

2008-09-17T07:00:00.000-04:00

The following is a copy of the letter I received from Brightcove TV. On September 13, 2008.

My Life In Chronic Pain has premiered on Brightcove.tv
WATCH NOW

On September 15, 2008, I received this email;

Congratulations, your video has been approved! We like the video you've recently uploaded and are delighted to feature it on our website. You will receive a follow-up email from ChronicPainConnection.com once your video has been published to the 2008 APF Pain and Creativity Exhibit.

I am excited. Not just for me, but for the millions of people living in chronic pain who cannot make a video, or write a poem, or draw a picture or do much more than answer their email on their computer.

These are the voices crying out for help and not getting any response. The millions of people who are under medicated and suffering needlessly. The medication and other medical procedures exist. But not for them. They have

no insurance and could not afford insurance at any price

have insurance but cannot afford their deductible for the office visit

have medicare and cannot afford their 20% for the surgery

are not aware that adequate therapeutic procedures are available

have a doctor who is not educated sufficiently to handle their chronic condition

The kind of pain I am talking about is not the kind of pain you feel when you stump your toe and it hurts for a day or two. It is not the kind of pain you get from a broken arm. Once the arm heals, you pain will go away. I am talking about a pain that has taken on a life of its own.

The injury, if any, heals but the pain continues. Some how the chemical make up of your brain has changed and you are in constant never ending pain. It is a pain you may have for the rest of your life.

Only working with your doctors and finding the right combination of medication, meditation, exercise, and nutrition will give you an acceptable quality of life. And, this may take years. But once you find that combination, the wait and the work is worth it!

Listen as these two doctors discuss their understanding of chronic pain.

What is Chronic Pain and What Does Your Chronic Pain Look Like?

2008-09-15T07:30:00.010-04:00

The American Pain Foundation (APF) is a non profit educational, research and advocacy organization working to eliminate the epidemic of under treatment of pain in America. In celebration of September being Pain Awareness Month, it recently asked its members and others suffering with chronic pain, to submit entries for the 2ND Annual "Pain and Creativity Exhibit".

Submissions could include photographs, photographs of still art, videos, music, and/or writings that reflect your experience in pain.

The APF will show selected submissions at the awards dinner in Baltimore, Maryland on October 23, 2008.

The question I answered is "What Does Chronic Pain Look Like and How Has It Influenced Your Life?"

When I am in unbearable pain and close my eyes, this picture is what I visualize my pain to be. The words explain how the pain has influenced my life. This is my submission.

After viewing this video, pleas click on the title of this article to view an additional video explaning what chronic pain is.

Are You Going Through Foreclosure Because Of A Chronic Illness? You Are Not Alone.

2008-09-08T00:39:00.009-04:00

I hope this video helps to calm some of the pain. Enjoy!

We are slowly saying goodbye to Summer. But not chronic pain, not the financial hardship, and not the physical losses that we endure because if it.

I recently read a post by Hinsley Ford that brought me to tears. Hinsley writes a blog titled The Oxygen Chronicles. I truly identify with where she is because I have been there. Hinsley's post are always exceptionally well written but this one-this one is so appropriate for this month.It was published on September 04, 2008 and is titled "A Quick Check In and Thoughts on Individual vs. Collective Grief".

As we strive to bring attention to the problems people suffering with chronic illness experience, the loss of our homes due to foreclosure is certainly at the top of that list.

I was fortunate enough to have family members who stepped in and saved my home. There are thousands of people who may not have that option. Not Hinsley Ford and maybe not you!

If you don't read another word this month, read Hinsley Ford's September 4th "Oxygen Chronicals".

September is Chronic Pain Awareness Month! Take Power Over the Source of Your Chronic Pain.

2008-09-04T19:00:00.002-04:00

With September here, summer is quickly waving us goodbye and autumn is shouting in HELLO! This is our month. It is Chronic Pain Awareness Month. September also includes National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week (Sept. 8th - 14, 2008)!

Chronic Pain Awareness Month helps to draw attention to; the importance of educating the general public of the growing number of people who suffer with chronic pain and its under treatment, to create an awareness of the opportunities and the beneficial programs that are presently available to us, spotlight the need for our congressional leaders to pass legislation to fund more research into ways to control or eliminate chronic pain and to give us an opportunity to work with grass root organizations within our communities in whatever capacity our illness allows.

LINKS THAT GIVE YOU THE OPPORTUNITY TO TAKE BACK YOUR POWER

Chronic Pain Connection

The Arthritis Foundation

American Pain Foundation

Advocacy for Patients with Chronic Illness, Inc.

Dr. Geoff's MedBlog

Hopekeepers Magazine

Cancer Care On Line Support Group

Power Over Pain Action Network

Vertigo Tinnitus Do You Have Meniere’s Disease?

2008-08-25T09:50:00.003-04:00

The windows are open letting in the refreshing smells of spring. The master bedroom drapes drawn closed although it was mid afternoon. Even dull light was more than my migraine could tolerate. Cloudy and raining outside, I could smell the rain soaking into the once dry soil but I could not hear it drifting down from the clouds and splattering on the driveway under the bathroom window. The spinning sensation inside my head kept me nauseas and unable to stand. It was compound by the sound of a TV, a radio, or a telephone. My house was incredibly silent. I seemed to be capable of hearing the phone ring a second before it actually rang. The aggravating hissing sound in my ears left me powerless to think of anything else but it.

The diagnoses came in late spring. "You have Meniere's disease." The Eye, Ears, Nose and Throat doctor went on to say there is no cure and the original cause is unknown. I am writing a prescription for a mild diuretic. It should help control the fluid buildup in your ears. I am also writing one to help control the nausea. Your hearing will fluctuate. Until one day, you are completely deaf.

He took out a "post it" and wrote something on it. He then told me to look it up on the computer. Just that quickly, he mater of factually announced his diagnosed and even quicker, he left the examining room.

I sat in his tiny little expensive examination room devastated. Two doctors, an MRI to rule out a tumor, months of hearing and balance test, dimension classification of hearing loss and a diagnosis I have never heard of, Meniere's disease. This is just great, something else incurable.

Several days later, between migraines, I struggled to watch the computer monitor. I looked at the "post it" he had given me-Men Eire's disease. I typed in the words and received a notice; did you mean
Meniere's disease? I clicked yes. There it was Meniere's disease. Named after the French doctor Prosper Meniere . Meniere's disease is a vestibular disorder that produces an abnormally large amount of fluid called endolymph that collects in the ear, thus affecting the brain and setting off recurring symptoms.

SYMPTOMS;

Trouble focusing on the written word

Vertigo-sever dizziness

Tinnitus-roaring sounds or loud ringing that never stops

Fluctuating hearing loss

Sensation of pressure or fullness that cannot be corrected by swallowing

Pain in the affected ear

Headaches

Abdominal discomfort

Diarrhea

ATTACK TRIGGERS;

Stress

Overwork

Fatigue

Emotional Distress

Abdominal illness

Pressure Changes

Certain Foods

Too much salt in foods

Working in a loud environment

For me, the biggest disappointments have been the not knowing when the next sever attack will occur, the balancing act I perform each time I take a step, and entering loud or busy places. They remind me that I am not whole. That something IS WRONG with me. Even though, some days I think I am perfectly fine. Then I try to maneuver through a door way without touching, rubbing against, or bumping it.

RESOURCES

Meneres.org

National Institute of Deafness and Other Communication Disorders or NIDCD

Vestibular Disorder Association or VEDA

No Matter What the Illness, Obtaining Optimum Health Demands a Fit Body

2008-08-13T18:45:00.003-04:00

No matter what the illness, obtaining optimum health demands that you keep your body as fit as you possibly can.

When we first acknowledge we are chronically ill, we tend to withdraw into the belief that our life is over. In our heads, we believe we have nothing else to contribute to this life. We are marking time and waiting on that last breath.

That is the self-pity raising its ugly head. Of course, if we listen, we trap ourselves in wretchedness. However, we have another avenue. We can acknowledge that we have the illness, determine what our limitations are and push the envelope right up to those limitations without crossing the line into additional pain.

We can still participate in physical activities. There are activities that allow us to exercise our body and get our heart pumping and that valuable blood flowing through our veins.

STRETCHING

There are times when even stretching is unbearable. However, when we are ready to change our situation, stretching our muscles is a good place to start.

At first, it may be tiring. Never the less, continue it. Eventually you will intuitively know which muscles need stretching. When you cannot do anything else, but you want to do something, stretch!

WALKING

If you are healthy enough to walk, count it as a blessing. A blessing that you previously took for granted. Chronically ill patients, who cannot walk, number in the millions. However, if you can, WALK. Walk, even if it is just walking around your room, your house, or your apartment. Move your body.

Following surgery, you may walk that same day. I was surprised following my first knee replacement. The transfer person entered my room and announced that my doctor wanted me to walk. In my head I am thinking not only is this transfer person crazy, my doctor is insane as well. Never the less, together, we maneuvered me out of the bed and down the hallway. Then slowly but surely I returned to my bed. Following surgery, moving your legs helps the blood flow and reduces the opportunity of blood clots forming, traveling to your heart, and killing you. It is hard work, it is painful, but it will not kill you. A blood clot can.

BREATH

Getting outside and breathing fresh air is everything. Taking deep breaths of clean fresh air is not only good for your lungs, but it can help to clear your thoughts. That is one of the reasons I encourage my chronically ill readers to start BAG GARDENS (NOTE: I do not receive any funds from these gardens). Working a garden will get you outside and allow you to interact with nature. While working the garden, it will get your mind off how sick you are, how much suffering you have been through and how much pain you are in. You might even learn a little something about your neighbor. You know the ones you were always too busy for when you were working.

Gardening may be the furthest thing from your mind. OK! You might be an artist, who chose another profession to support the life style you thought you needed. Now, that you are disabled, it might be just the time to take up your passion. Laura of Designing Woman does just that. When her health allows, she paints designer furniture. The work is so detailed; you can just imagine her losing her pain in her artwork.

EAT

Healthy eating is imperative. Eating fresh vegetables (I personally prefer them raw) will supply you with natural nutrients and help your system work at its finest. The importance of fresh vegetables is why I am dedicated to finding ways to introduce them into each meal.

If you are just too ill and have neither energy nor the area to grow a bag garden, multiple vitamins are certainly a good substitute. Be cautious, some vitamins can interact with your medication. ALWAYS talk with your doctor before adding them to your diet.

ATTITUDE

Attitude is everything. Our condition is not a curse. In most cases, the illness stops us long enough to allow us to choose a new direction. How we feel about our illness can be a hindrance or it can thrust us into an exciting new life. If we listen and are open to making the positive changes, our life enriches to a degree that we never knew existed.

My position is this, whatever steps you need to get your body as healthy as it can be, take those steps toward your future. All of your previous steps brought you here to the very place you are right now.

Chronically Ill and Needing A Stress Release, Bag or Key Hole Gardening Maybe Your Answer

2008-08-04T08:00:00.026-04:00

It is the first week of August! With the publication of my Spring video, I had stated that with the onset of each season, I would share my yard. Suffering with a chronic illness, the heat can be just as dangerous to venture out in, as the cold. This week you don't have to. You can enjoy the beauty of the outside right from the (sort of) comfort of your computer chair.

Oddly enough, gardening is one of the few outlets that those of us in chronic pain still enjoy. Gardening does not require world shaping decisions, life threatening concentration, or even great coordination. If you plant something in one area and it does not grow well, move it. If you forget where you put your gardening tools, use a kitchen knife or screwdriver instead. When weeding or watering, If your coordination is less than desirable, keep your cane with you and use it to lean on.

Now, I cannot say that I have dug one (1) hole in my yard. I am fortunate enough to have help. But I do, when my health allows, keep the weeds pulled out and the plants watered. It is my version of exercise. It is definately my way to relieve stress.

While viewing the video and you notice the weeds, look over them and assume my health did not allow it. Constantly escalating prices have created a desire to have my own vegetable garden next year. I found just the help for all of us. They are called Bag Gardens and Key Hole Gardens. Both gardens require full sun. Never the less, they require very little space, very little strength to build, and their up keep is minimal.

Key Hole Gardens , so named because when you look down at it from the top, it resembles a key hole, were originally created by HIV patients in Africa. These gardens allowed the patient to grow their own nutritional food. Thus, staying healthier and living longer.

The opening allows the person working the garden to reach it from all sides. As a result of the high rate of HIV deaths most of the gardens in Africa are built and taken care of by children or the elderly. The Key hole garden can be as tall or as short as you desire.
CLICK to view the video instructing the construction of the Key Hole garden.

The Bag Garden can even be purchased and constructed at your own speed. These bags are now sold as starter kits for school children. However, in Africa and cost conscious families around the world, the bags is much larger.

Some cost conscious gardeners are creating multiple bag gardens containing a variety of fruit and vegetables.

CLICK to view instructional video.

If each gardener would make one of these gardens, we could not only feed our family, we could help those less fortunate who do not have a place to put a garden.

Just out of curiosity, I called our local Food Bank. I asked if they took fresh fruit and vegetables from local gardeners. She said "Yes! We do it all the time. The need is so great that the fresh vegetables and fruit go quickly". She also stated that they gave receipts for the gardener to receive tax credit from the IRS.

So, here is my challenge to my fellow gardeners or soon to be gardeners;

Be proactive about your own nutrition. At this moment, we have no idea where our fresh food is from

Plant enough seeds or seedlings to support your family

Share any excess harvest with your local Food Bank.

Pass this information on to someone you know can benefit from it

Ask help from someone who does not have a place for a garden. Ask if they would like to share with building, caring for and harvesting the new garden

Aw-inspiring People Who Are Helping the Chronically Ill Through Blogging

2008-07-28T04:50:00.003-04:00

Blogging gives me the opportunity to interact with many creatively awe-inspiring people whom I would not ordinarily meet. The writing of a blog usually dictates the need for research to give validity to a post. The pursuit for that information is when you find those hidden diamonds.

Sherril Johnson is one such diamond. Although she suffers with multiple illnesses, she writes The Invisible Chronic Illness Experience (a patient's advocate blog), leads support and or facilitate a group on fibromyalgia and, the National Alliance on Mental Illness Connection (NAMI). In addition, Sherril has recently started a political blog entitled "The Truth Shall Make You Free". Sherril is a testament to the fact that, as bloggers, we use what is harming us to help others.

Sherril is an active member of the Café Chronicque RA group of which I am a member.

Jethava Paavan is the author of the HEALTH CARE BLOGGER and is a member of my "Living with a Chronic Illness Community".

One blog of Jethava's that I treasured was his Yoga blog. It contains a video that shows you how to perform Pilates. It contains positions that allow the well and us not so well to perform the exercises. I was surprised that I was capable of performing most of these positions.

Jethava is a young man who is not sick. Never the less, he provides pertinent health information for those who are.

Speedcat Hollydale
is a humorist. He is also a member of my "Living with a Chronic Illness Community.

His site is surprisingly gorgeous and yet imaginative. However, I challenge you to visit his site, read "Legend of the Phepping Peoples" and not laugh aloud. He is that good.

Speedcat has a large following. Through the use of his astounding imagination. he has earned every addition to his community.

Chronic pain can be psychologically depleting. Doctors, therapist, etc. encourage us to stay positive. In addition, they state that laughter helps us to heal. I once read an article (I forget where or when) affirming that the chemical makeup of tears of joy and tears from sadness is different. If that is true, then Speedcat Hollydale is the therapy prescribed by the doctor.

Terry Marsh writes a blog expressing his feeling on anything you can imagine. His blog entitled "The World As I See It" knows no boundaries. Is he political? He can be! Terry offers up both sides of any controversy and is a member of my "Living With A Chronic Illness" Community.

If you have discerned, from my description that you know him, you would be wrong. His professional journalists extends much deeper than that. His "A Guy's Point of View" blog is another undiscovered diamond. It is a-tell all of what and how men think-strictly from a man's point of view. My personal favorite is "Why Men Lie". If you are in, have been in, or are looking to be in a relationship with a man, it is a necessary read.

Stress creates many of the illnesses of which we suffer. As women, not understanding our partner, we draw conclusions with one side of the story, ours. Terry Marsh gives us a glimpse into the other side of that truth.

Giving Yourself Approval to be Human While Suffering With Chronic Pain

2008-07-18T08:05:00.002-04:00

Anyone reading the list of books on my Shelfari Book Shelf, at the bottom of my blog, is well aware that I have read a reasonable amount of self help books. I thought I had evolved into a non judgemental decent human being. So, why could I not have compassion for a recent acquaintance following their surgery?

It stayed in my head most of the day. What is wrong with you? Where is all that spiritual growth and evolution you have engrossed yourself in all these years?

You have been through what they are going through. You know how difficult the surgery is to recover from. You know the healing will take much longer than the six weeks that the surgeon allots for recovery. You know that the rehabilitation is painful and will take dedication and determination for them to obtain a full recovery. I felt terrible. Not for them. But, because I felt no compassion for them.

While talking to my sister, I casually mentioned the surgery. I then added, "and I don't know what is wrong with me. I don't feel any compassion for them". I thought my sister would be perplexed. But, she simply said, "I was just reading an article this morning about people with chronic illness not allowing themselves to be human". I also believe that when we ask for answers we receive them. So, I was not surprised that the answer was coming from the only person I had talked to all day!

Not allowing myself to be human. I had not heard those words pertaining to me before. She went on, "We have to be who we are at the moment and not beat ourselves over the head because we think we are not behaving in the proper way. Humm! Not behaving in the proper way.

That was me alright. I thought with all my reading, and courses, and education, I should feel something for them. And I did but, it was not nice. It was callous.

So, now you know how I felt, I thought, when you said, " Oh, It can't be that bad. You need to get out of that bed and get moving. That is the best thing for you. That bed just takes all your energy".

I don't remember much more of the phone conversation with my sister. I was stuck at "let yourself be human".

I thought of other instances when we don't let our self be human.

When we do more than our bodies can tolerate. Eventually opening ourselves up to a physical and/or mental breakdown.

When we multi task for no reason. Talking to your child, talking on the phone and looking at TV adds up to not doing any of them very well. If you are talking to your child, talk to your child. If your are talking on the phone, talk on the phone. If you are watching TV, watch TV. But be there, be attentive and be present with what ever you are doing.

When we allow cyber space to overshadow our personal lives. Now I like blogging. However, if someone says do you want to go...and my pain is minimal, I am half way to the front door.

When we neglect our families while they are with us to do meaningless task. Be there for them while they are there with you. None of us know what tomorrow will bring. And what if it never comes?

The words "Your greatest adversary is your greatest teacher" flowed in and through my mind. In allowing myself to be human, I accepted the fact that I was angry with them for not validating my pain. In doing so, I was honoring what I felt and was able to release the anger. I gave myself permission to forgive their hurtful but, I am sure, well meaning words. That gave me closure of the situation. I was then able to humanly pick up the phone and talk to them compassionately.

In her book "One Day My Soul Just Opened Up" by Iyanla Vanzant, her formula for compassion is

Support + Comfort + Nourishment = COMPASSION.

I love the Charles Huttle's quote "You have no patient but yourself" It reminds me that there is way too much about me that is in need of repair to judge or criticize others. I repeat his quote to myself often.

Acupuncture - Chronically Ill Patients Swear by Their Life Changing Results

2008-07-11T03:00:00.003-04:00

In the Eastern civilization, acupuncture has, for thousands of years, been used as part of the holistic healing process. Nevertheless, it is just starting to explode in the West. Most of us have seen the pictures of patients sitting or lying on a table with long needles sticking from their body. Well, after hearing my sister, Ann, relate to me her amazing results, I wanted it and I wanted it bad.

Acupuncture is a part of holistic treatment. Holistic is the whole body approach toward a more balanced lifestyle. It is considered the most extensive health care in history. Phylamena lila Desy says that it is an ongoing journey toward being healthier and living better. For best results, healthier eating and an exercises such as Qi Gong is sometimes suggested.

Qi Gong as taught by Dr.Brophy consist of meditative techniques and special movements that can benefit people of all ages and physical condition. Finally an exercise that even I can do. We will certainly go into this on a future blog.

Unlike hypodermic needles, the needles used in acupuncture are solid and much smaller. Acupuncture causes the body to release chemicals into the body called endorphins. When natural endorphins are released into the body they help you feel emotionally better. Now I could use that. The needles also divert blood flow to the injured area promoting healing. Dr Mao says that it is not unusually for some bruising to occur in the areas where the needles perforated the tiny blood vessels. But, the bruising should go away in a few days.

Because of a deteriorating hip, my sister, Ann, has recently retired. She called me in tears telling of her unbearable pain and that her prescribed medication was not working. There had to be something else. We stayed up way into the morning. Just talking. She calmed down, we said our I love yous and hung up the phone.

A few days later, she ran into a friend who told her about acupuncture. She called and told me she was going to try it. one of my many philosophies in life is "if you think it can help you, it just might".

Following her first visit, she called me from her car. She was so excited-this could not wait until she arrived home. Ann said she was not feeling any pain. That was all I needed to hear. I was sold. But she was not through. She stated that she was not walking with her cane. She felt great.

Her acupuncturist suggested she see him three times a week. In the event her pain returned before her next appointment, he showed her a pressure point on her hand that would ease or stop the pain. He also suggested an acupuncture pen or laser pen to help her apply a more centralized pressure.

When her pain returns, she follows his instructions. it truly is a new way of life and a new way of thinking.

It is not a cure. But the pain medication I take all day long is not either. The difference is when she leaves a session with her acupuncturist, she can get in her car and go where ever she wants to go. When I take my pain medication, if I were to drive a car, it is called driving under the influence (DUI).

No acupuncturist will tell you to stop taking your doctor recommended medication. It is meant to work along side these treatments. As you improve you may be able to reduce your other medications (only you will know that). But acupuncture's primary goal is to effectively provide you with the relief, the level of health and the life style you are seeking.

Me? Well, I called medicare and inquired about acupuncture, I was told that no alternative procedure is covered by Medicare.

Understand Glaucoma by Partnering With Your Doctor To Preserve Your Vision.

2008-07-04T07:33:00.003-04:00

What is Glaucoma? How much sight have I lost? Can my vision be restored? Can my vision be saved? When you are told you have glaucoma, these are some of the first question that run into your thoughts. But don't let them stay there. You should talk each one of them out with your doctor. There are so many reasons to get a clear understanding of what you need to do and what your treatment will consist of. The main one being, of course, to save your sight.

As with diabetes, there are two types of glaucoma:

open angle glaucoma is when the iris (the color part of the eye) is visible but not working properly. The usual prescribed treatment is eye drops. Open angle glaucoma is what I suffer with..

angle-closure glaucoma is when the natural drain of the eye is blocked by the iris (the color part of the eye). To open the drain, laser surgery is usually prescribed and eye drops may also be prescribed.

Both types of glaucoma cause pressure to buildup in the eye. The pressure is called the interocular pressure or IOP. The IOP damages the nerve and causes vision loss. The average IOP is 16 millimeters of mercury. However the level at which the IOP damages the optic nerve can differs from patient to patient.

The severity of your glaucoma can be determined by a visual field test. In advanced glaucoma, the test will show advanced deterioration of visual loss that may impact your daily activity such as driving, reading, and avoiding falls.

Open angel glaucoma dose not cause symptoms until visual field damage is extensive. The lack of symptoms is why optic nerve and visual field test are imperative. I was recently severely scolded, and rightfully so. I had not been tested in two years.

I was making appointments. But not keeping them. I was suffering with arthritis, high blood pressure and diabetes simultaneously and was just too sick to go and concentrate on those visual field test. That was my excuse. My doctor was not having any of that. He told me that "had I been a no show for that appointment, he was excusing himself from being my doctor". He told me he had seen too many people loose their sight from that type of behavior.

When my prescription ran out I would call the office and have it refilled. My doctor was very clear about the possibility that the drops could have stooped working and even thou I was taking the drops, I could have lost my sight.

Angle-closure glaucoma may have a sudden increase of eye pressure with symptoms that may include

eye pain

halos around lights

headache and

nausea and vomiting.

Treatments for glaucoma cannot restore vision but it is the best way to keep the glaucoma from worsening. The main complaint with treatment is that the medications may cause the lashes to grow longer and darker with prolonged use. and It may result with the appearance of dark circles under the eyes and light colored eyes may permanently turn darker. If you miss a dose of eye drops, take the dose as soon as possible. If it is close to time for your nest dose, wait and take the scheduled dose. Do not double up on medication.

I would be remiss, if I did not mention the continued research of Marijuana in helping people with glaucoma. Last week Richard Lovet wrote an excellent blog for the National Geographic News concerning his latest findings on the use of Marijuana to treat different types of cancer, arthritis, as well as glaucoma.

Mr. Lovet's article created quite a heated discussion in the Diggs blogging community this week.

Staying healthy is as important as taking your eye drops. If you have other diseases such as diabetes, high blood pressure and or heart disease they should be appropriately treated. Some doctors also suggest multiple vitamins, eating leafy green vegetables, exercise and weight loss for obese patents.

Creating Peaceful Spaces At Home

2008-06-26T17:13:00.001-04:00

With the rise in oil prices, not only in America, countries around the world are feeling the sting at the gas pump. Some smaller countries have even resorted to protesting and rioting over what they believe to be unfair gas prices.

High gas prices are stimulating millions of drivers to change their way of life. Even those of us who can no longer drive because of a disability are finding our purse strings tighten. Prescriptions with a deductible of 7.00 dollars last month are $10.00 dollars this month. And, who would ever have thought that a gallon of milk would cost more than $5.00 dollars? Yes leaving home has become a luxury.

Cabin fever dose not have to enter into the equation. There are little things that many people have discovered to create a atmosphere of peace even in the eye of the economic storm.

The simple arrangement of out side furniture can create an area of thought provoking quite time.

Flowers strategically planted outside a kitchen window can also bring a smile each time you look out your window.

Your creations don't have to be elaborate or expensive. They should reflect your personality.

Preferable, you will create an area that requires very little time. I personally like perennials. Perennials return each year and your only chores are to keep the weeds out of the garden, give them a little food, and occasionally, a drink of water. They will do the rest.

Potted plants can cheer up any space. Make it your area by introducing a few well placed items that you love. Perfection is not the goal, relaxation is. You don't need a lot of space, just make it your place.

Managing Chronic Pain-This Patient's Prospective

2008-06-16T05:00:00.000-04:00

No matter how many commercials you are exposed to by the media, chronic pain cannot be controlled by over the counter drugs. Chronic pain requires a combination of oral medications (commonly called a "medical cocktail") as well as, pain medication injected directly into the inflamed area. Once your pain gets to the level where ordinary pain medication cannot stop the sharp, stabbing, grinding never ending but constantly increasing pain, you are most likely searching for, or have been referred to, a "Pain Management Doctor".

Pain Management is not an easy or quick fix. It may, as it has with me, take years for you and your doctor to find the right combination of medication. My pain is managed by a team of doctors at Tennessee Valley Pain Management.

At first the amount of medication can be overwhelming, especially if you are still in pain. But you must be be involved. An uninvolved patient creates an ineffective doctor. Every patient is different. Maybe that needs repeating. Every patient is different. Waiting until your next appointment thirty days into the future to notify your doctor that the last prescription is not helping you is unacceptable. There is no pain medication that takes that long to work. It helps or it dose not.

When pain block injections are used. These injections are performed in doctor's offices or "Out Patient Medical Centers". Surgeons perform surgery in these out patient centers daily. With the continued reduction of what insurance companies will pay for their policy holders medical care, these medical facilities are becoming more abundant. As a result, doctors are opting to use them instead of hospitals.

One of the major causes of pain in aging adults is the degeneration of the disc of the lumbar spine. As we age, the disk gradually drys out losing strength and resiliency.

As shown above, degenerative disc disease can cause the disc to lose height resulting in the narrowing of nerve pathways and causing nerve impingement, inflammation and pain. Says Doctor Darryle Antonacci, MD F.A.C.S

Epidural Steroid Injections

Epidural Steroid injections are commonly used to relieve chronic pain. For the proper placement of the medication into the damaged area, the use of fluoroscopy or live x-ray is used. The doctor monitors his direction by watching a screen showing the x-ray of your spine as you lay on the operating table. Usually a solution of cortisone, local anesthetic and saline is injected into the inflamed area.

The type of anesthetic is called twilight. I usually find myself going in and out of consciousness. Sometimes I can feel and hear what is taking place and sometimes I am completely out of it.

Once the procedure is completed, you are taken to a recovery area where you remain until the staff is sure you are not having an adverse reaction to the medication. This takes about an hour. You are then wheeled out to who ever has accompanied you to the procedure. You must have a driver or no anesthetic can be used.

Side Effects that have affected me are

Localized increase in pain - usually last a few days following the injection

Anxiety

Sleeplessness

High blood sugar - my blood sugar levels are elevated for about a week following a procedure

Decrease in the immune system. I have suffered with staph infections twice

Cataracts were recently diagnosed by Dr. John E. Miller , my ophthalmologist. He sees no reason for concern at this time. The cataracts could be from normal aging or from prolonged use of steroid medication.

The purpose of this blog is to inform you of the help that is available for you. Of course, there are others and they will be discussed in future blogs. The important thing is that you are as informed as possible. When you walk into that office, go in with the confidence and knowledge that you are making an educated decision. Make it your decision and not just an agreement to a suggestion that your doctor has made to you. You always have the right to refuse a procedure.

Stop Fighting Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. You Will Not Win!

2008-05-10T06:30:00.000-04:00

Chronic Fatigue is the body's way of protecting its self when it has been physically and or mentally overused. The body's response is to slow down and attempt to heal its self.

Some of the treatments are

Vitamin, mineral and or iron supplements.

Hypnosis

Positive thinking courses and

Artificial light therapy for Seasonal Chronic Fatigue

Recently I experienced a week of working on a retirement Thank You letter for a friend, going to the doctor on the same day as the retirement reception, finishing a video for my blog, visiting a friend who had a total knee replacement, and visiting my elderly father. I was exhausted and felt terrible.

I know better. However, the retiring friend is a close friend from child hood. I love her dearly. I would not have thought of not being there for her retirement. A few years ago, she completely sponsored my retirement luncheon. Over the years, we have been as close as any sisters have. Both our hearts would have been broken had I not been there.

The morning of the retirement, I went to the doctor to get two of the five medications it takes to keep my Arthritic pain under control. Limping and bent over, in an attempt to find a position to relieve the pain, I felt twice my age. The sciatic nerve that runs down my right side was not happy. I needed a Toradol shot. Once the nurse injected me with it, my normal regime would have been to stay in bed for the rest of the afternoon. I had thirty minutes to get dressed and get to the retirement reception.

During the retirement reception, my right knee became inflamed and swollen. I
enjoyed the reception, but I was happy to be home and able to elevate that leg.

I slept for about two hours and was up again working on the slide show that I had started several days before.

When I finally got into bed, I was pleased with the result of the slide show. I understand that what took me sever days to produce may have taken a well person only a few hours. Nevertheless, I was NOT well and I DID create the video I wanted, myself.

This time, when I awoke, I had only been asleep for about four hours. Sleeplessness is another contributor to Chronic Fatigue. I felt weak and sick. Unable to get up, I laid there until I drifted back off to sleep.

Over the years, I have learned to listen to my body and, generally, I do what it is telling me to do. It usually works out to be in my best interest. It was telling me to stay in bed. Therefore, I did. I was in bed all that day and most of the next day.

When my body said it was OK to get up and move around again, I did.

I prepared to go to the hospital to see my sick friend. I called my friend who had the total knee replacement and learned she was at home. Off I went to see her. I had not talked to her
in several days and was missing our long face to face conversations.

Doctors still find it difficult to diagnose and treat Chronic Fatigue. It often goes missed diagnosed and some doctors, not too long ago, would tell their patients "It is all in your head. The test results prove there is nothing wrong with you".

Suffering with chronic fatigue is frustrating. However, it teaches you how to cope or how to give up.

Each day, I make my "Daily List" of what my mind wants to do. I proceed with what my body can do.

There is no fighting to keep going. There is not one day that I wish I had done more. There is, however, gratitude for what I was able to do, even if it is, for that day, just going to the next room without assistance.

"The Lord did not do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?" Author unknown

Pets Helping To Heal Chronic Illness

2008-05-03T11:00:00.000-04:00

On March 13, 2008, I post a blog concerning Chewie, the Shih Tzu, his old and his new family. Now, some of you are wondering how he is adjusting. Chewie has happily settled in with his new family and they, as we knew they would, love him dearly.

So to satisfy all those concerned, Chewie's pictures are spot lighted on this blog addressing "Pets Helping To Heal Chronic Illness".

A growing number of Western doctors have finally learned that pets help to relieve stress, anxiety and possible lower high blood pressure. Some doctors, my doctor included, take their dogs to work with them. My Pain Control doctor has a beautiful Pit Bull who strolls from one examining room to the next visiting with eagerly awaiting patients.

Many nursing homes even have dogs who visit during the day and some who live on the premises. For physically confined patients these pets are the only loving visitors they may receive for the rest of their lives.

When I was confined to my home, more precise my bed, my son came to live with and take care of me. In passing, he mentioned that he was going to purchase a dog. I, on the other hand was not in favor of his purchasing a dog. I love animals. But I did not want to have the added burden of his taking care of an animal and me.

In constant pain, weak, angry and in fear of what tomorrow would bring, I was a hand full. Although he was not causing the problems, he received the full force of my wrath. I had not yet learned to treat him as the adult that he is. I was still paying the roll of mother to a child instead of one adult sharing a home with another adult.

That soon changed. The dog he purchased was named Blue Beauty. She is definitely that. She would stay as close to me as I would allow. That meant right outside my bedroom door.

I slowly found myself sitting in the living room so that I could pet her. I would sometimes not have the strength to set up so I would lie on the sofa and she on the floor. I would pet her until I was too weak. Often times I would fall asleep on the sofa enjoying her company and she mine.

As my health improved, we would take walks outside. She, however loved to run. I would sit and weed the garden my son had planted and she would stretch her legs running. One day on one of her runs around the yard, I fell walking up the stairs. I was not hurt. Never the less, Blue Beauty rushed to my side. I could feel the concern in her body and see it in her eyes. To this day, if she and I are the only ones in the yard, Blue Beauty is never far from my side.

Oh yes, I no longer require medication for anxiety or high blood pressure!

It Is Springtime In Velda's Yard

2008-04-23T22:41:00.000-04:00

Sometime we just need something to take our minds off our illness for just a moment. I hope that this video gives you two minutes and twenty seconds of joy. And in turn, helps to brighten your day!

In my yard, is where I spend most of my time. As the song says; "I Just Want To Be Loved". I truley do love this yard. So, I guess it is getting what it wants.

There is something blooming in this yard all year round. There is always something beautiful to see. Even when I am too ill to go outside, I can look out any window of my home and be grateful.

This year I have decided to make a video of each season so you may also enjoy it's beauty.

You Can Come Out Of Depression.

2008-04-22T09:30:00.000-04:00

There is a feeling of loss of YOU. There are days, weeks, months or even years, when you feel that your soul is literally in a dark deep hole. You may or may not have a physical illness, but fatigue leaves you with no energy to get out of bed. Sadness consumes your entire day. Moreover, you have thoughts of death or suicide. You are quite possibly a victim of clinical depression. Whether or not you stay the victim is up to you.

Almost anything can cause depression

You are aging and are not physically capable of living your life the way you have previously.
You have an illness (maybe even several illnesses) or injury that is limiting your life style.
You have lost a love one (including a pet) and the loss seems more important than your desire to live on.
You are separating, separated, divorcing, divorced or just plan lonely and you do not believe anyone will care if you are gone.
You have retired, lost your job or had to end your career on disability and now, unexpectedly, feel useless and or guilty.

These are signs of clinical depression.

Your first step is to stop thinking of yourself as a victim and take control of your situation. The first step toward improving any situation is to change the way YOU feel about the situation.

Call and set up an appointment to speak with you family doctor. Notice that the term I used was "speak with".
Take a list of your present medications and a list of your symptoms.

The list of medications can alert your doctor if you are suffering with a reaction to multiple medications. The list of your symptoms will help you remember just what you are going through.You are able to speak with him and give him a comprehensive blueprint of your situation. You are in control of your doctor's visit. He is now able to prescribe test and x-rays. The results of the test will guide your doctor in determining if you have a brain tumor or are suffering with clinical depression or something else. If it is a brain tumor, you and your doctor will determine in which direction to proceed. If the diagnosis is clinical depression, your doctor may suggest medication, a psychologist or both.

Living in depression is dangerous and deadly. I consider myself an inside expert. This blog is not to give you my medical advice. That could be just as deadly, not to mention illegal. It is to give you information from someone who has suffered with it on and off for over thirty years. I am someone who has walked in your shoes and overcome its potentially deadly grip. Your shoes were so tight on my feet that I contemplated suicide two times. Now I realize that in each instance, the only thing that kept me from carrying out that pressing desire was I found something to live for. In those instances, dying seemed so much easier than living. I found something to live for.

My first encounter with depression was at the age of 24. My marriage was starting to deteriorate. I did not know what to do to get it back on track. I felt lost and alone. I was an active churchgoer. But I would not have dreamed of telling my minister (my father's best friend) that my husband had been unfaithful and to get back at him I had an affair also. I had committed adultery-a sin. I was that quite lady who was at the front of the church, with family in tow, each Sunday morning. It all looked good. However, it was a mess. It felt messy.

I very seldom went into a liquor store. However, I did that evening. I bought a fifth of wine. I drove to the edge of the river where the boats go into the water and I set there. I cried and I drank wine. I reminisced over how wonderful my marriage had been and tried to understand how it had gone so wrong. I set there looking at the water and thinking that all I had to do was to put the car in drive and put my feet on the gas. I could not swim. No one would know where to look for me and no one would care.

Somewhere In all that sadness, I saw our child. He is my only son. He is the child for whom I would do anything. Would I live for him? Or would I leave him here to wonder why his mother chose to kill herself. Would I leave him here to wonder if it were something, he said or did? Would I leave him here for other people to tell my story? What would that story be? No one knew what was going on in our family (not my friends and not my family). Moreover, who would raise my five year old? How would they raise him? Because of my actions, would he grow up to one day take his own life? Yes! I found my reason to live in the eyes of my son. I could not I would not leave him!

Twelve years later, an arthroscopic knee repair, a gallbladder removal surgery and a total knee replacement within fifteen months kept me homebound. Before my family doctor diagnosed my Rheumatoid Arthritis and my gynecologist diagnosed my gallbladder problems, I had been sick for years. I went through countless medications and examinations before I found the doctors who diagnosed my illness correctly. Nevertheless, I still suffered sharp pain that would stop me in my tracks. Despite countless tests by specialist, no doctor found it. Scar tissue from a previous hysterectomy completely blocked my colon. That was the reason for the sharp pains and that was why I found myself in emergency surgery. Within two years, I had four surgeries. Then I realized that something was not quite right at home again. My marriage had ended. I just did not know it. The-none- funny thing was; I did not see it coming.

This time I was not suicidal. I was angry, hurt, sad, and I felt terribly alone. I was clinically depressed. My doctor prescribed anti depressant medication. What resulted was someone who did not cry, did not complain and easily managed. I found myself complying with whatever was asked of me. I stayed in that marriage five more years. I had to come off the medication to find the strength to tell MYSELF enough! I am not telling anyone to stop his or her medication. What I am saying is there may come a time that you no longer need the medication. It is up to you and your doctor to decide when that time is.

The last depression was the big one. A combination of medical problems made it impossible to continue my career. I fought medical retirement with every ounce of energy I had. It really is true that "what you resist persist". I had surgery on my right knee twice in eight months. In addition to Rheumatoid Arthritis, Osteoarthritis was causing my spine to deteriorate. I developed Type2 Diabetes, High blood pressure, Men Eire's Disease, glaucoma and chronic fatigue. Between the clinical depression and the combination of medications, I slept more hours than I was awake. When I awoke, I was still in chronic pain. I felt and looked sick. I needed the assistance of a walker or a cane most of the time. In addition, I felt that I was in financial ruin. I saw no end to the whole situation. I got into my car with the intent of not returning home. However, instead I found myself at my mother's grave. I remember setting there talking to her through my tears as if she were setting in front of me. I do not know how long I was there. It was one of those ugly cries. I cried so had that my entire body shook. I fell asleep on top of her grave. When I awoke, I was no longer hysterical. I felt at peace.

I returned home and called to talk to a therapist. I talked to him for several hours. He made an appointment for evaluation. Hospitalization was not required. I was on suicide watch, by my family, for about two months. For two months, I was never alone. In addition, I was again on medication. This time I took anti depressants for about two years and I was working through therapy for about a year. I understood my disability, but I could not understand this overpowering sadness.

In the thirty years that I worked, something that I never thought I would say is "I missed the people whom I worked with. I missed certain aspects of my job". I understood my illness. However, I could not understand the longing to be back with the people I worked with. At a recent Retirement Dinner, I received my answer. Eleven out of the twelve former employees I talked with said they too went through clinical depression when they retired. Some made a point to mention that it took several years for them to get over it.

What I know now is this; I may not be able to change my situation, but I can change my attitude and my thinking about my situation.

I was afraid. Fear is paralyzing. I was afraid to make, what I thought were, major decisions. I was afraid that I could not live financially comfortably once I went on disability. I was afraid of how people would judge my disability and me. I was afraid of losing the people around me. I was afraid of losing the things I had accumulated. I was afraid of dying. Some days I was afraid I would live.

What I learned is this

Living in fear is leaving in a state of resistant to change. Resisting change causes anxiety and depression.
It does not matter what anyone else says or does. What I say about me determines what I believe about me.
What someone thinks about me is of no consequence to me. How I feel about me changed my life.
If someone leaves, then it is time for them to go. I may or may not miss them. Nevertheless, it is time for us to part.
My living situation has changed. I do not worry about how perfect my house is or is not. I enjoy my home as it is today. If I feel like cleaning, I will clean. If I do not and I have company, I enjoy my company.
The Bible says it best "This too shall pass". Good or bad, life changes from moment to moment. I no longer fear those moments. I accept that they are and adjust accordingly.

I love to hear and fell my heartbeat. It makes me grateful to be alive! I now know how to stay that way.

ADD, the Invisible Disease of RA

2008-04-08T21:00:00.001-04:00

Doctor - What are your mornings like?

Patient - I wake up in pain. The kind of pain that I did not know anyone could live with. I take my medication. I go back to bed.

Doctor - And, does the medication stop the pain?

Patient - No, It just takes the edge off it.

Doctor- Does sitting, standing, or lying down help your pain?

Patient - Usually lying down with my legs propped up helps.

Friend - I came by to see if you wanted to go to lunch.

Sick Friend - I would love to get out of this house. However, I have been in so much pain today. I am afraid I would not be very good company. Maybe we can try it another day.

Friend – But, you do not look like anything is wrong with you.

If these words ring cold in your ears, you, like me, are probably suffering with the Autoimmune Deficiency Disease of Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA). With RA, the body fights off infections. However, once the illness has healed, the body malfunctions and continues fighting as if the disease is still in your body. It then attacks parts of your body that are perfectly healthy. Joints and internal organs are at risk. Having suffered with Arthritis for over thirty years, I cannot count how many times I have heard those words. "You don't look like anything is wrong with you."

At first, we accepted the statement as a compliment. You think to yourself, "At least I don't look as bad as I feel." Nevertheless, as it continues to ravage your physical frame, those simple words start to cut into your spirit. Maybe the person is attempting to pay you a compliment. On the other hand, maybe, when they cannot see any visible changes in your appearance, that person simply cannot phantom that you could be as ill as you say you are.

No matter what their reason, we need to hear and feel the validation. "Yes, I can tell you don't seem to feel well today". "Yes, I see you are moving slower and with great difficulty". These are words, you may never hear. Not even from your doctor. The absence of these words is what sends so many of us into depression and eventually to a psychologist.

Our world has changed forever. To stop the pain, we will go through many treatments, medications, medical procedures, and operations. If we are lucky, we find something that gives us temporary relief. After all, that is actually what all the exercise, change in what we eat, and the barrage of medical treatments are for. We simply want to stop the pain.

For years, many of us conceal our illness from our employer, our family and our friends. We do not want to be different. We cannot afford to lose our job. Or passed over for a promising promotion. We do not want our family to think that we are needy and our friends to think that we are no longer fun loving. We want to appear as normal as possible.

RA eventually makes decisions for us. We finally conclude that we are going to have to end our careers. Our getting dressed for work used to take a casual hour. Now, it may take two or three hours. On the other hand, we may start getting ready for work and simply do not have the energy to push ourselves any further. We reluctantly return to bed, maybe for that day or maybe for that week. RA does not operate within our timetable and neither does the depression that so often accompanies it.

Usually, we only let people in when the illness has become chronic. Our bodies have deteriorated to the point that we must enlighten others of our inability to take full care of ourselves. Our being told, by well meaning family members, "you just needed to get out of bed", does not give us the energy to get up. Our being cautioned "You are on too much medication", does not stop the unbearable pain that we, not the well-meaning love one, are experiencing without the medication. There is little sympathy or understanding for suffers of the invisible illness of RA.

As time passes, our invisible illness starts to outwardly show its' ugliness. By that time, we have usually experienced years of chronic pain, feelings of separateness, miss understanding, and our social calendar is nonexistent.

The Gift Of Peace

2008-03-13T22:38:00.000-04:00

In the calm of an evening, following a day of gardening, the words;" You need a dog to help you share this joy and to love you when you are setting in your yard”, came to my now cancer free sister. These were strong words to a woman who, in her adult life, was not a pet lover. Now, she would appreciate their beauty from a distance. And, even comment on how well behaved her neighbor’s trespassing pets had become since she put down that “Pet A Way”. But for every essence of her being to be emitting “You - Need - a - Dog” was an astonishing revelation.

The power of knowing who she is-right now-today is what made her obedient to that still voice. You know. That quite still voice that affects you like a burglar alarm going off. The same one that will wake you from a deep sleep with the answer to a question . A question that you did not know you had ask. And yet, the guidance is there. Her respect of her intuition and understand of her elevated spiritual growth allowed her to be totally open to the idea. Later that evening, when her daughter arrived home from work, she made her announcement. “It is time for us to get a dog”. Her daughter is a professional pet trainer. Trying not to faint, she asked her mother to repeat it.

The ground rules were laid out. It would have to be an outside dog, maybe a Rottweiler. Her daughter would be responsible for its training. Everything was perfect. They purchased a new home last year. They have a large fenced in back yard with plenty of room for it to run and play. My sister is retired. So, apart from her gardening, she has plenty of time to spend with her new pet.

A few days later, her daughter came home with good news. “Mom, I may have found us a dog”. It is an older dog. "Not what I was expecting", she thought. The dog is a Shih Tzu, still thinking, "That is not an outside dog". Her daughter went on. "It sometimes stays at our dog day care. His owner is dying. She has cancer. It has spread through out her body. You can come tomorrow and visit with him. If you like him, Mom, I will talk to her". Upon hearing the dog’s history, she understood why the still voice had spoken to her in her garden that evening. Yes, talk to her! I know he will be fine.

Having overcome the clutches of cancer herself, my sister fully understands the owner’s persistent pursuit to find her best friend, Chewie, a good loving home. There is something mystical about the power of real love. A love that transfers from one person's pleas during prayer through our higher awareness into another person sitting in a swing enjoying their back yard. That is the power of God.

His bed, toys, food and papers have been delivered to his new home. He is scheduled to arrive this evening. At the end of our phone conversation, she told me, “I have to get off the phone. My new son is due to arrive at any minute”. I thought, "her new best friend is arriving".

Obviously, the owner's dog brought her many days of joyful peaceful moments. She chose to share the love that she has experienced by giving him to another deserving family. What a wise choice this lady has made.

At the perfect time in her life, my sister chose to accept the love of a dog whom she did not know existed nor had she ever met him. My sister only knew that the still voice in her head said that she needed him. She needed him to share her joy and to love her.

The courageous lady can find comfort in knowing that her dog is with two people who will shelter him in their beautiful home. They will reciprocate all the love that he gives. And, they will be forever grateful because she chose to share her gift of peace, a little Shih Tzu named Chewie.

Abuse Of Prescribed Or Over the Counter Medication Is Dangerous and Can Be Deadly

2008-03-06T06:32:00.000-05:00

There are millions of us who suffer with chronic pain daily. The medication that is prescribed to help relieve that pain is not a joy ride for us. And, because so many people who the medication was not prescribed for abuse them, we stand a chance of losing some of those medications .

Yesterday, on two different news programs, there were two separate reports of an adult going to four different doctors to obtain prescriptions for hydrocodone (a narcotic) and a teenager overdosing on four 80mg of oxycontin (a narcotic usually given to terminally ill patience).

Instead of the community holding the people who abused the medication responsible, a local pharmacist suggest that the medication be taken off the market. He made note that several people under similar circumstances had died over the last few years because of the medications. The news stations seemed to agree with him.

I take oxycodone. It is no where near as potent as 80mg of oxycontin. However, it was reported that, just last week, another teenager died when he crushed several oxycodone pills and took them to get high. This medicine is meant to be taken over a period of several hours. Not all at once. These are choices people, bad choices, deadly choices but, choices just the same.

While I wholeheartedly sympathize with the grieving families, let us be sensible and realistic. These teenagers died because they abused a controlled substance. This medicine is coming from someone else's medicine cabinet. The medication was not prescribed for these teenagers. They were not even taking it as prescribed. It is not the pharmaceuticals responsibility to raise our children. It is ours!

For those of us who take narcotics daily to control our pain, it is no surprise that the lady who filled four prescriptions from four different doctors (this is called "doctor shopping") was caught. She used Medicare to get them filled. It is a surprise, however, that Medicare paid for them to be filled.

It has been my experience that a controlled substance requires random drug testing by your doctor. I was also told by a nurse that the doctors now have a number they can call and all of the medications that have been filled for a particular patient will show up no mater where it was filled.

So, there are fail safes in place. However, the ultimate responsibility still lies with the consumer. Treat your medications as you would any other valuable asset. Keep them in a safe place.

Living With A Chronic Illness Web Site

The Pharmacy Checker

Physically Challenged? We Can Travel With Fewer Propblems.

2008-02-25T14:20:00.000-05:00

Having a chronic illness dose not mean that you stop enjoying your life. It means that you will joyfully live your life differently.

It is no secret that I suffer with chronic debilitating arthritis. However, my lesser known illness are, Type 2 Diabetes, Sleep Apnea, Men Eire's Disease, Glaucoma, Esophagus Reflux, High Blood Pressure, and Carpal Tunnels.

So, it comes as no surprise that when I travel, I am accompanied with medication and a barrage of machines that serve to keep me healthier; A blood pressure testing monitor, test strips, lancets as well as a lancing device for my diabetes, A rather bulky "C" Pack with humidifier for my sleep apena and wrist braces to control my wrist movements for the carpal tunnels.

For safety reasons, all of this equipment must be kept with me when I board an air plane, a bus, a cruise ship, travel on a train or take an overnight road trip. And you are thinking, with todays travel restrictions, she is going to experience a travel nightmare. WRONG! It is all in the preparation.

Recently, I traveled from the east coast to Denver CO. by air plane. My sister, whom I have always referred to as "The World Traveler", informed me that I needed to contact the travel agent and give the agent the following information;

I would need a wheel chair with assistance,
I would be traveling with my medications in their original containers
To give her a list of the machines that I would be traveling with and
Inform her that I had knee replacements.

If your reservations are made over the Internet, simply contact the airline and hotel directly.

The travel agent then contacted the air line with my information. It was put in the computer and when I arrived at the air port. I informed the employee checking me in that I had requested a wheel chair with assistance. This service is provided by the air line as a courtesy. So there is no charge. You are expected to tip the assistant. The assistant is with you from the time you check in until he or she delivers you to your boarding area. They are also great with helping you get through security with a minimal of stress.

If you are as debilitated as I am, and only you know your limitations, I would suggest that you travel with a companion. But, if you don't have one, don't let that stop you from traveling. Make that phone call and find out what other assistance is available to you.

There may be additional expenses. But, ask questions. On a cruise to Mexico, I was required to pay a $30.00 deposit for an extension cord with the correct plug. When I returned the cord at the end of the cruise, it was refunded.

Finally, when you make your hotel reservations, request handicap accommodations. Most hotels have rooms set up with grip bars in their bathrooms as well as raised seats for our safety.

We are the Baby Boomers of America. 78 million strong*. As we age the world is changing to accommodate us. So, ask questions. Make your request. Help the world give us what we want and need. Not what they think we want.

*Pit Stop For Pain Relief by J. A. Dorizas, M.D.

Passion Get a Way Travel

Trust Your Doctor? Take A Closer Look!

2008-02-22T15:04:00.001-05:00

My second knee replacement seemed to be going as expected. You wake up in recovery feeling excruciating pain and wondering "what made me think this was a wise decision?" Maybe your inability to put any weight on that knee? The need to get well and get back to work? The belief that your quality of life will improve?

This was a full knee replacement. So, after three days I was moved to physical therapy at another facility. During the transfer, one of the ambulance attendants dropped me. It happened to be the one holding the foot of the transfer cot. I could not conceive or believe what was happening to me.

Tears streaming, and fear soaring, I was moved into the ambulance with out either of the attendants saying a word to me. Not I am sorry. Not are you alright. Not a word. I was terrified. When I arrived at the physical therapy hospital I was inconsolable.

The attending nurse took down my statement and quickly called the doctor who had been assigned to me for my rehabilitation. He prescribed a sedative along with pain medication. Two days later I was visited by two men who said they were representing the original hospital.

Apparently the person who dropped me was sick and after the accident, checked into the emergency room. They wanted to know what I wanted to do. Under morphine and without anyone there to represent me. I made the decision that I just wanted a record of the incident. I, unfortunately, did not ask for a copy of the report.

During my follow up appointment with my knee surgeon, I again told of the dropping incident. I told the therapist who came to my home following my dismissal from the rehabilitation hospital. When I went to my general practitioner, I told him about the incident.

After two years of being told that " it takes time for these things to heal" and "The ex rays don't show a problem", I went for a second opinion. His ex rays revealed something quite different. The left side of my right knee was not attached to anything. Apparently, when my legs jarred to the floor, the cement used to set the artificial knee to my bone did not set correctly.

Literally, I had been walking on a broken leg. I was going to have to go through another painful knee replacement. I was going to have to be off work again. And, I felt completely devastated.

The original doctor never admitted what the ex rays clearly showed. When I asked him for my records, I learned that dropping incident was not included in my files. My general practitioner had not recorded the incident either. And the hospital where I went through rehabilitation has gone out of business.

I choose the doctor whom I went to for the second opinion to preform the knee replacement. I have a slight phobia with ambulance attendants and I take very good care of my new knees.

What do your think? Did the doctors cover up the incident so that they would not have to get involved in a possible law suite? Were they protecting the hospital that they are affiliated with? Do they simply keep inaccurate notes?

FIND A DOCTOR IN YOUR COMMUNITY

LIVING WITH A CHRONIC ILLNESS